Instinctual Guidance
by kivey
Summary: You ever had a day, just a simple day, where you made a spur of the moment choice, an impulsive decision? Did it happen after stress? After a sudden shock to your world? Sometimes it does, sometimes you make a split second choice without realizing the consequences. Here is a story about one such person to do so, and the consequences of his choice.


**Chapter One: Trust Your Instincts**

 **Naruto's POV**

He groaned softly as he sat up stretching in the slightly uncomfortable mattress. He looked around the small room with slightly blurry vision trying to blink it away as quick as he could and could feel the grogginess slowly fade away. He tensed slightly as his eyes landed on the calendar posted on the cracked, and dirty wall, the pealing pant ignored for the most part. He sighed softly before letting his feet touch the freezing cold floor and let out another sigh as he tensed up a bit more. He didn't need to flip the light switch to his room to know the light wasn't going to come on, it never did around this time of year, for at least the week before and the week after the date they were on. He stood quickly throwing his hands above his head and stretching trying to dispel the tension and failing miserably. He always slowly tensed up to this day and even further, until the next week finally passed. The sight of the black circle on the calendar mocked him from its position on the wall and he walked into the kitchen hoping to grab something fast and leave.

He scratched at his cheek as he shoveled another thing of cereal into his mouth moaning internally at how he forgot to restock on instant ramen. 'Another fantastic day this is every year.' He thought bitterly sighing as he dumped the half-finished bowl into the sink only to notice not only was it full but it was back up as well. He opened the cold water side of the faucet and stared unsurprised as nothing came out. He turned and tried the stove top knowing it was gas and slouched slightly as the thing didn't even bother to push out any gas and the clicking was not there either. 'Oh well, what was I honestly expecting from today, and change of pace?' He thought to himself looking around for a clean pair of clothes to wear. He pulled open the last drawer in his dresser and blinked as it was also empty, every last one of his jumpsuits were either to dirty or ripped apart. He glanced down seeing the simple white shirt and boxers on and knew he couldn't just leave in that while being a ninja had slowly destroyed his modesty or care for being naked or half-dressed it wouldn't win him any points towards those he would be walking near.

He turned to the thrown open closet and glanced inside seeing only a black pair of pants hanging from the racks and sighed before pulling it on. He left quickly wanting to get out of the room that was already massively disappointing and depressing him. He shoved his hands in his pockets and walked through the streets slouched over. Just like at the beginning of the week the insults came, they were quiet and more like mumbles but he had always had exceptional hearing. Today always seemed to be the worst, the most vulgar, the most painful to hear. 'It's almost like at the start of the week the test the waters and slowly build up to this.' He thought tilting his head a bit lower as another bitter smile broke out on his face. He mentally pulled his smile back together and attempted to ignore it failing with each word thrown, but he could always pretend, pretend the words didn't affect him, and at least keep others from knowing.

He continued walking down the street moving slowly since he didn't have anywhere to be at the moment. It was probably expected of him to show up at Tsunade's office and bother her with a request to go after Sasuke, not that he really wanted to at the moment. It wasn't so much that he didn't want to save Sasuke, he did, but he knew that the safest option probably wasn't to bother or if that failed to remove him as a threat. He had learned a lot while gone with Jiraiya, not that his few weeks being back showed it. He didn't really learn much from Jiraiya but he learned enough on his own to understand that the world wasn't really fair and that sometimes people just needed to die. He couldn't say that to everyone though, not just because he still struggled to believe that with Sasuke but also because he was supposed to be the happy go lucky guy who pushed everyone to save a friend.

At this moment though he didnt feel like that guy, and with the fact that his friends werent really much more than coworkers at best he didnt feel the fire inside to fight for it much. He stopped and sighed softly as everyone had once again jumped out of his path, and he disappeared quickly in a flash. He stood on the rooftops and looked down at the villagers seeeing them all slowly go back to being happy, happy he wasnt in their presence anymore. "Good, The Bastard finally left." One said loud enough for him to hear and he slumped forwards in resignation. 'Maybe I wont ever get their appreciation, even if I make it to Hokage, not that it doesnt seem more and more like a pipe dream each year that goes by.' He thought bitterly moving across the rooftops for the hokage tower. He felt a small smile break out at the thought of at least being around two people who cared, who actually wanted him around, even if he had to play the part of an annoying idiot.

Admittedly he wasnt that smart, he could come up with genius plans in the middle of a battle on the fly, and some strategies he made were nothing short of being form the mind of a super genius but he wasnt the smartest person around. He personally blamed his teachers, outright baring him from certain classes or lessons, things he deseperatly needed to know. Then again one of the failings of his Teachers while he was a Genin was assuming he already knew all that and threw him to the wolves as far as learning goes. Or maybe they knew and decided it wasnt worth it to teach him anything since he couldnt even learn the bare minimum of basics. He felt the smile fade away as that thought caught him off guard before shaking it off and moving for the window to the Hokage's office seeing no one inside. He cracked the window slightly and climbed in and stopped as the sound of light talking was heard outside the door. "Jiraiya, I cant have this conversation again." Tsunade said the door handle turning for a moment before moving back into place.

"Tsunade, he needs to know, you know as well as I he only has a few weeks left before it's all lost, the last vestiges of it all will be confiscated by those who could care less." Jiraiya said slowly. "He isnt ready, even you agree on that, I cant run the risk of hurting him, he's had enough of that in his life." Tsunade said sighing towards the end. "So you would have him give it all up? Lose everything except the knowledge never hold anything of theirs?" Jiraiya asked bitting the words off at the end. He could feel the anger from Tsunade from behind the door. "Yes, the Knowledge should be enough! Besides, it's dangerous to throw so much in his hands so quickly." Tsunade said anger clear in her voice. "You cant protect him forever, he is a Ninja and an adult, he deserves to know." jiraiya said calmly seriousness laced in his words. "I will protect him for as long as I can, He's all I have left, I just cant agree. Now if you'll excuse me I am going to grab a drink before work, youve really pissed me off." tsunade said with a growl at the end. "Fine, Dont come to me when it all comes crashing down, I warned you." Jiraiya said before silence took over the halls.

He sighed in slight relief and decided to wait in the office until Tsunade came back from her little drinking break. It was a little odd she wasnt having it in the office but it wasnt too difficult for him to ignore. He plopped himself in the Hokage seat and shifted it back and forth getting a feel for it before propping his feet up on the desk. 'This feels odd.' He thought looking around the room lazily. He saw one of the drawers was slightly open and he could see the edge of a scroll inside. 'Huh wonder what that is.' He thought of ignoring it for a moment. He could feel the sweat form as he tried to block out the curiosity. He relented quickly and opened the draw pulling the strange scroll out of the drawer. A small set of initials was written on the sealed edge and he pulled it apart and unrolled the seal to see what was inside.

His mind froze as his hands gripped the paper tightly. He could feel it crease in his hands and slowly relaxed them so as to not damage the paper to much. He could feel his stress level skyrocket his mind running a mile a minute to make sense of the document in his hands. An offocial record of his parents, and just what was being left to him. He tightened the seal on his emotions as he read on trying to figure things out before jumping to conclusions, the family he never had, it was kept from him, from the three people who knew, they didnt want him to know. He could feel his anger grow and tried to push it down. He slightly succeeded, he didnt feel anger or at least not enough to pull out the Kyuubi and start tearing into people. Everything about his life was a lie, everything he had achieved meant nothing, all his attempts to gain the respect of everyone was a waste, how could they ever respect him when they were blatantly spitting in his face with this knowledge.

More then that the peices were slowly coming together, Tsunade didnt want him to know, and he could guess that if he didnt know a few weeks from now everything his parents owned would be given to some greedy councilors. He felt conflicted he didnt want to be angry with her, he heard her reasons but he didnt want to just let it go, everything he ever dreamed of as a child, the knowledge of his parents, whether they loved him or not, if they left anything at all for him, it was held back by her. He took a deep breath to calm himself and pushed the thought out of his mind. 'I cant stay here, I cant be around these people.' He thought quickly glancing around helplessly for anything to help him with his plight. His eyes stopped on a small stake of scrolls, Missing-Nin scrolls, the storage containers for those who abandoned their village.

His eyes widened as a thought came over him. 'If they want me gone, if they want to spit in my face and degrade my work, then let them suffer for it.' He thought slowly frowning slowly as he made a split second decision, one that was very poorly thought over and clearly in the moment. He made the decision to abandon Konoha, to become a Missing-Nin, to become a criminal. The first step would be to get out, but first, he had to make sure no one expected he was inside the room, that way he couldnt be a suspect to early for him to actually get away. He rolled the scroll up carefully and placed it back in its place and slowly closed the drawer back to its origonal position and moved for the window. Once he was back outside he closed it silently and turned back in the direction of his apartment. He pushed and laucnhed him over the streets and across the rooftops in front of him. It didnt take long for him to get home, much shorter since he didnt walk slowly down the streets first. He pushed the door open and closed it behind him moving quickly into the living area. He pushed the bed out of the way and reached for the one loose floorboard in the apartment and pulled it up and over revealing the small laquered wood box stuffed inside.

He pulled the lid off slowly and looked over the small stash of money inside, it was much more than he could ever have made doing D-ranks for a few months straight, being what was left over from the portion of Zabuza's bounty he recrieved and anything he had saved and not spent on Ramen or training supplies. He stuffed the money in his pockets and dropped the wood box on the floor ignoring it and the shitty apartment he called home now that he got what he wanted. He turned to leave and stopped at the two picture he had, some of the few things he had kept in his home. The first ebing the team picture his sensei had them all take. He stared for a moment taking it off the wall before it slipped through his fingers he stared as the class broke and the wood cracked before grabbing the other. He traced his finger over the picture he had taken with Tsunade. It was his happiest moment, having gained a family even if it was a small one and a little strange of one.

He hesitated for a moment before he shook it off and gently set the picture down on the nearby counter. as easy as it might have been to take anger out on Sakura, Sasuke, and Kakashi, he couldnt bring himself to smash the happest photo he had. He closed the door silently behind him locking it before tossing the only key he had left into the nearby alley. If he wasnt going to be returning he might as well make it an annoyance for anyone else to get in and use the place. He jumped down to the lower line of buildings and moved off for the shinobi merchatile district. It wasnt that big and it was technically a subsection of the merchantile distrcit on the outer edge of the place itself. but it went deeper into the forests that were inside the village and let more space for stores. He moved through the place avoiding most people and blew off the famous and well used stores. It would be too easy to be noticed going in and out, and considering he would need new clothes in order to have any chance of leaving without notice it would be easy to question why he was changing his style.

He stopped in the street as a small store near a larger cluster of tree's caught his eye. Not many people came out this far for stuff so it was liekly he could safely shop here. His money wouldnt buy a lot but he could easily get some clothes and maybe some weapons if they sold any. He moved towards the small building and pushed the door open seeing the bell swing back and forth as a small ring sounded out. "Oh, a customer." An old man said smilling slightly before giving him a look over. He could see the mans smile change slightly, he couldnt really tell to what but it shifted slightly. "Taking a trip then?" The old man asked the small smile on his face. He looked at the man for a moment and shifted in place unable to look into the mans eyes for some reason. "Something like that." he mumbled getting a small nod and sigh. "Well, no worries, you arent the first to visit my ship when stocking up for a trip." The man said quietly before stepping out from behind the counter. "Everyone has a reason after all, but enough about that, come along no time to waste, cant let it be said someone couldnt find what they needed in my store eh?" The old man said leading him through the small selection of aisle's. Clothes down one, weapons another, a large assortment of axes, knives, swords, maces, everything really.

Or it seemed like everything at least. He stopped in the clothing Aisle as a small selection of pants caught his eye, he chose a few ANBU cargo pants, a couple pairs of Wiremesh shirts and a jacket, He switched out his sandals for reinforced steel toe combat boots. The jacket thankfully had a hood attached and that could help conceal him a little bit. He grabbed a pair of fingerless gloves in order to protect as much of his hands as he could afford to cover. He moved out of the aisle and glanced back towards the weapons section hesitating for a moment. He wasnt trained in any weapon aside from Kunai and Shuriken, and while he didnt think Swords would be all that different, swing and stab after all, he doubted he could afford one. He stared for a bit longer and sighed as he figured there wasnt much to lose by taking a look. He moved into the large section and glanced around in amazement. While most weapons were mostly the same just in different styles there were some intersting choices.

Metallic Claws, Axes, Katana's, Tanto's, and a strange Sickle-like weapon, were lined neatly and evenly along the shelves and he glanced over the swords themselves. He frowned at the length of a Tanto, it was a little short, he could achieve the same damage with a kunai and some skill. His eyes glossed over the Katana's and found himself looking over each one in detail. He grimaced lightly as he saw the more ornate and flashy Katana's, while that probably would have been his go to before now something inside him was screaming that he avoid choosing something so noticable. His eyes stopped on a plane black colored hilt, no obvious ornaments, no gems or gold to denote worth or wealth. He pulled it up and thumbed the guard letting the blade pop out a bit from the sheath and listened as he slowly pulled the blade out. The sound was very faint, it was a little difficult to pick up on the sound and he slowly sheathed the blade listening carefully. "You have a good eye." A voice said from behind him making him pull the blade an level it quickly.

He stood awkwardly unsure if he was holding it right but shook it away to stare at the old man who owned the shop. "Oh my, I apologize I didnt mean to startle you, I am simply impressed someone has such a good eye for blades." The old man said making him lower the blade quickly and frown. "What do you mean?" He asked curiously at the statement. "Many people have come down this aisle and chosen blades, most choose something flashy, or with gems and precious metals, thinking the worthiness of a blade was in how it was presented. Admittedly most these people were civilians, or young Genin, The worth of a blade is in its reliability, the most reliable blade is where the best materials are in the blade istelf not its ornaments." The old man said with a small smile. "How did you choose the blade?" The old man asked pointing towards the sheath in his hands.

"I dont know really, something was telling me I wouldnt be wanting anything really flashy or expensive looking, and this one caught my eye." He said getting a small laugh. He smiled a bit at the old mans amusement. "You know they saw the swordsman doesnt choose the blade, the blade chooses the swordsman. Will you be buying that blade today?" The old man asked making him think for a moment. "I dont think I will be able to, I have to be a little careful with my money." He said getting a small frown as the old man rubbed his small beard. "Tell you what, Tell me a little about your trip, and I will let you have the blade free of charge." The old man said making him blink in surprise. "Are you sure?" He asked getting a short laugh. "I'd rather it be owned by someone who will use it, rather than sit on my shelf waiting for an owner that may never come." The old man said turning and walking towards the counter.

"You may set your items on the counter, I have some tea in the back waiting for us." The old man said making him nod slowly and drop the set of clothes on the counter along with a single scroll and the Katana. He sat across the man a small cup of tea in his hands warming them slightly. He felt slightly uneasy of the mans soft smile. "So why is it you wish to leave?" The old man asked making him nearly spit out the tea in surprise. "How did you know?" He asked getting a loud laugh. "Gaki, the only customers I get are those leaving, my shop is a final resupply store for those leaving." The old man said making him shift in his seat at the revelation. He felt a little guilty for making the mans shop continue the trend. "None of that now, if had these conversations before, but you are honsetly the first to feel such, it is a little refreshing, and nice to see a kind young man here but it doesnt change your decision, nor do I wish it too." The old man said making him relax a bit.

"So what is it that caused this choice?" The old man asked. "Too many things, so many over my life, I mostly went each day trying to just let it go, move on but I don't think I ever let anything go, and this last thing just kind of finished it for me." He said getting a sad smile. "It is sad to see someone so young be so hurt, I am sorry for whatever you have faced, I won't ask you for specifics, it would be a little too personal for me to hear, I wish you all the luck in the world however." The old man said standing slowly. He followed the guy out and pulled the money he needed out handing it over. "Good luck on your adventure." The old man said as he sealed up his extra clothes hooking the Katana to his side. He stepped out into the slightly darker sky, it wasn't night or anywhere near that but he could see massive rain clouds moving in. He smiled a bit at how his luck struck well for him. He moved through the tree's towards the village's south gate and watched in silence as a small group of traders walked through the gate heading to the market district. He saw a small argument break out distracting the gate guards and dashed through leaping to the tree's and making a large distance appear. He stopped a few miles out and waited his body tense as he wondered if anyone saw and gave chase.

He waited for a good half hour before relaxing a small bit knowing anyone who had followed would have caught up in a few minutes maybe just a bit longer. 'Kyuubi, what should I do now?' He thought hearing a low growl. **"You should have simply burned that pathetic village down, Meatbag. At least you did something intelligent and left that place and will get stronger if you wish to live."** Kyuubi said making him narrow his eyes lightly. 'Not what I meant, furball.' He thought in response hearing a snarl. **"You will refrain from giving me such a moronic nickname, I do not care what you wish to do, just get stronger so my jailor isn't so pathetic."** Kyuubi said angrily going silent immediately after. He knew his best option to get away easily would be to go somewhere that was allied with the village, since they wouldn't report his presence he would have an easier time evading capture. Tea country was one area he could safely go, and it was somewhat along his current path.

He felt a grip of fear hit him for a moment as he realized he could be tracked through the toads. He fought indecision, he wanted to get away, get far away from the place that spits in his face, but he didn't totally want to separate himself from those he cared for. He swallowed thickly and flashed through the summoning jutsu. He waited silently as the smoke cleared giving a fake grin. "Yo, Naruto, what's up?" Gamakichi asked waving. "Hey, Kichi, you mind if I have the summoning scroll for a few minutes, I want to look something over." He said getting a small shrug. "What's in it for me?" Gamakichi asked getting him to laugh at the question. "Well, how about next time I summon you, I give you double the amount of candy?" He asked getting a small scoff. "Three times the amount or no deal." Gamakichi said making him throw his hands in the air. "Gah, you're gonna take all my money! Fine." He said getting a small grin as the toad poofed away. He stared for a moment sadly before schooling himself with his famous grin.

"Here you do bro, but don't take too long, Pops doesn't like being asked for stuff and it being gone long." Gamakichi said making him nod. He walked away a bit and unrolled the scroll. He glanced over the names and raised his thumb to his mouth. He froze slightly as he knew this would be one decision he couldn't take back, another one on top of abandoning his village that is. He sighed softly as he bit into it and smeared the blood over his name crossing it out. He saw it flash slightly before darkening to black and rolled the scroll up slowly. He walked back and handed it back over with a smile. "Remember bro, three times the candy!" Gamakichi said taking it in his hands. "Sure thing Kichi." He said with a smile as the toad disappeared. His smile dropped and he sighed sadly for a moment. "Sure thing." He mumbled into the fading smoke.

He felt the urge to wallow in sadness for a moment but pushed it back, like he had been doing with all his emotions today and moved back into the trees. It would be best to leave the area he was just in, it wouldn't be too difficult for the toads to recognize it, and even though the rain would help wash away his scent, it was best to make as much distance as possible in order to maximize his success in escaping. 'I'm always going to be on the run now.' He thought peering down at the headband in his right hand he had pulled off during his tree jumping. He stopped for a moment glancing over the shiny metal, it wasn't polished, it had a few nicks and scratches. He knew he could wear it anymore, at least not as is, he would be hated more so if he kept it unmarked. He pulled the kunai from his belt and quickly swiped through it not giving enough time for the hesitation to come. He glared down at the slight reflection in the scared metal. He tied the headband around his neck letting it be something that would show with his hood on. He would wear the mark of shame openly, it wouldn't matter much if it was hidden if someone hears his name after all.

 **A/N: Hey this is the first chapter for a new fic, yes it's Naruto, yes I know my other fic has people clamoring for a new chapter, I already released a new one and I will not be abandoning it for this. This is to get an idea down in the site and keep it going of course. also, it's to help me get my creative side moving again. hopefully, with two fics I can keep pumping out new ideas for each fic. This is a new skin of an old trick, yes It's Naruto abandoning the Leaf. Yes, he goes Nuke-Nin. it's an old story idea but I wanted to put a new spin on it. this isn't your typical he hates the leaf, grungy angsty bullshit. No this is a story where a serious of stressful days pile up and one sudden change in his worldview causes him to panic and use his instincts to drive his decision to leave, its one of those spur of the moment impulsive decisions that some people look back on and go "why did I do that?" He has to live with the consequences now, and he will adapt. On top of that, the world is a harsh place and he will change, I will have him deal with real-world themes. not too many as this is fiction after all and I do want it to be an enjoyable story. but enough to show a change in character.**

 **I've been curious about a new style to an old thing and decided why the hell not, plus I have like eleven finished chapters for this that I am going to have to revise and possibly edit to get it to fit my new writing style and expectations. I hope you enjoy it, if not thats fine too.**


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